To live a life of Love...

Time for me rant here...

Do you know that feeling when you feel like your the little guy?

It sucks big time.

Looking for approval, waiting for someone to tell you that what your doing is right or wrong...
Gahh...

I realized I've been living like that, and I'm sick of it.

Living with the fear that what I'm doing might be wrong, and the other might disapprove of it. And whenever that would happen I would feel demolished.

I guess this is the most crippling trait I've ever had.
It stops me from moving forward. Gets me stagnant, paralyzed, because I would be afraid to make mistakes, afraid to fail, afraid to make a fool out of myself, afraid what the other might think of me.

I'm so sick of it.

I don't care now. Whatever people will think. I don't care. You don't like me, then that's your problem.

I'm breaking out of this crippling cycle, this paralyzing fear.

I'm going to do my thing, by my own decisions, on my own accord. You're not going to tell me what to do. You're going to ask me, and I'll decide. I'll be my own boss thank you...

And if I make mistakes, then so be it. I will learn from it.

I don't want to live a life driven by fears, to do things because I feared.

But I want to live a life of love, to do things because I loved, with nothing held back, and nothing stopping me.

To do everything out of Love.

That is what I aspire to do... To be fully alive.

"The Glory of God is a person who is fully alive."
-Saint Irenaeus